How to manage love when one is very busy

There are works that end once the eight hours of working hours are finished, others that last longer, and many others that, as in the case of the actors, have disparate schedules and scenarios. Thinking about the working life of the interpreters can lead to imagining an idyllic life, but the truth is that after that facade a great Time and space instability That can lead to another more difficult to solve, the emotional.

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If some rumors indicated that one of the causes of the Kendall Jenner and Bad Bunny rupture It was the distance and the tight agenda of both, everything seems to indicate that the little sister of the model is the opposite. In his relationship with actor Timothée Chalamet there seems to be no attention or distance problems. This has recently pointed out a source of the international environment Peoplepointing out that, although, “with the awards and premieres season, at the beginning of the year its relationship was intense,” Kylie Jenner tries to adapt to the actor’s trips and schedules whenever she can: “He had free time to go to prizes and premieres with him. He could not support his career.” And, according to the same testimony, it seems that interest is reciprocal, because it has also pointed out that, “when they are together in Los Angeles, he also spends time with her children.”

Although in this case both have managed to fit their schedules well, the truth is that their case is not usual in the universe of Star Systembut neither between the Grosso means of the population. Only in Spain, on average, 40.3 hours per week, according to data from Organization for Economic Development and Cooperation (OECD).

But it is known that there is a large percentage of people outside this amount who work many more hours, such as many self -employed and people without contracts.

A high figure if we take into account that, to combine leisure time, and the other responsibilities of the day, they are free 16 hours, of which, according to doctors, 7 or 8 are to sleep.

Given this data, it seems clear to say that we barely have time to dedicate it to our sentimental relationships, or at least, to take care of them as we would like.

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Want a relationship or to have it

Being with someone implies attention, affection, care and empathy. And, without time, it is difficult to give off energy in it. Therefore, before trying to manage the few free time we have with a couple, Susana Ivorra, director of the Center for Psychology and Couple Therapy Susana Ivorra, proposes to ask first if we are at an appropriate time to have a relationship.

“If you are who is very busy, do you really have space in your life for the commitment and care that requires a relationship? Because we can be excited, in love, and think that we cannot let that opportunity and person escape; but, have we really thought if we are willing to reorganize our priorities To make room for that bond? “He launches the psychologist as a reflection.

In addition, this specialist also comments on a very relevant point: “We must think about whether we are at the right time not to give the leftovers of our time and energy, if we can also be aware of their things.”

Priority issue: Search for quality time

But what happens if we are the other part? If we are the ones who accompany and adapt our life to that of someone who barely has space for the relationship? On this, Susana Ivorra also invites an important reflection: “If you are the other party, then you have to see if you are willing, not only to share your life, but to turn largely around another person, and be who reorganizes their routines and their spaces with other people, to adapt. “

Often, when we fall in love or excite ourselves with someone, it is easy to ignore these nuances, convinced that everything can be accommodated naturally. However, day to day it can be very different, and expectations can play very bad passes.

Therefore, as the expert points out, “it is necessary to continually review if the balance we reach continues to be held with new situations. The agreements to which we reach at a given time are not permanent; they must be frequently reviewed.” That is, it should be asked If the union is still in a healthy space for both.

For their part, who lives absorbed by labor or personal commitments must remember that priorities are not declared in word, but are demonstrated. “The priorities are shown in our actions, in what we do, not what we think or feel,” says Susana Ivorra. From there, if the relationship really matters, “it will be essential Find moments of quality, Practice active listening and be attentive to important things for the other, “as she says.

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In short, a healthy relationship between two people with unequal life rhythms demands much more awareness, constant adjustments and, above all, the genuine commitment of want to hold that common space without either of the two stop being who he is. That Kylie Jenner and Timothée Chalamet continue together has a lot to do with it. She has time, and he, whenever she can, also dedicates it to her.

Sometimes we determine to immerse ourselves in a relationship, but we are not at the most appropriate time (and, therefore, either healthy) to do so. And, although it is always better to take distance from someone, than to harm the relationship (letting go, they say, it is a way of wanting), we can always try to reorganize our priorities.

It is not easy, but life is to decide, and here the responsibility is typical of each one. Love and work can and should be compatible, it is only necessary to know in which part of the board we are, and try to fit well the puzzle. If pieces are missing, then it will be impossible.